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Lessons I've Learned
I've learned that you cannot make someone love
you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give
in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just
assholes.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only
takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen
minutes. After that, you'd better have a big dick or huge tits.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they
are more fucked up than you think.
I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're
finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we
are celebrities.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship
is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of
money to take its place.
I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you
when you're down will be the ones who do.
I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends, because
their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves.
I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children,
they will eventually get arrested and end up in the local paper.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are
taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just
never go away.
I've learned to say "Fuck 'em if they can't take a
joke" in 6 languages.
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